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11:7 Go to, let us go down, and there confound their language, that they may not understand one another’s speech.

For such a long book, I am often surprised to see that the things I learned as a child – and I thought these were the really important stories – are often really really short.  I recall having loads of lessons, back before I bothered reading it, where the telling took hours.  So, we begin Genesis 11 with the Tower of Babel.  Now, without looking, how long do you think this tale is?  Remember, it tells how early man spoke just one language (probably because all the multitudes had Noah as the common ancestor) and they all got together to build the highest tower ever made to go up and see heaven.  How long? (find out after the jump)

Continue reading ‘The Bible – Short and Important Stories’ »

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But unto Cain and to his offering he had not respect. And Cain was very wroth, and his countenance fell.

In the first part, we saw how God placed temptation in the way of Adam and Eve, and then punished them when they fell for it.  I think that this was the first “dick move” God perpetrated on mankind.  Over the coming books we will see how he refines this.

When I was at school, as soon as we knew the meaning of the word “knew” in the Bible, much hilarity ensued.  Especially if someone used the word innocently.  Simpler times.  Anyway, Genesis 4:1 Adam knows Eve and she has a son and they call him Cain.  He then knows her again and they have Abel.  Abel is a shepherd and Cain is a farmer.  They both work hard and present the Lord with their offerings: Abel gives a sheep because he is a sheep herder and Cain hands over the fruits of his work.  Two men giving honestly and without malice.  And the Lord, who apparently knows everything (including your inner most thoughts) goes absolutely crazy over Cain’s offering and, though I wasn’t there at the time, probably insults him.  Dick move number 2 really, if we only count the whole of the Garden of Eden story as one big dick move.  As God says:

4:6 And the LORD said unto Cain, Why art thou wroth? and why is thy countenance fallen?

4:7 If thou doest well, shalt thou not be accepted? and if thou doest not well, sin lieth at the door. And unto thee shall be his desire, and thou shalt rule over him. Continue reading ‘The Bible – What Adam Did Next’ »